It amazes me how easy it is to feel lonely in this city.
And its not for lack of company. In fact, I am rarely alone except for when I sleep. But i’m talking about the kind of company that has meaning, not just the random strangers you meet and interact with for one minute, one hour or one day.

The type of friendships that last a lifetime, in my opinion, are not formed in bars or nightclubs.
Instant friends.

The type you only speak about sport, drinking and fun in the sun with. The type that doesn’t know or care what your last (or first) name is… The kind you drink with one night, and have to be re-introduced to the next.

There are very few people who I can open up to.. I mean, really open up. I’m a very gregarious, friendly, bubbly type. I make instant friends easily, but its all surface, all for show.

I desperately want to be able to drop the act. To be calm, quiet, almost introverted. I would like to be able to spend my nights having quiet dinner and a glass of wine (imported, of course) and discuss belly button lint, but it seems that to get to that stage, one must meet others while out drinking.

And so one faces the conundrum, do I stay in, quiet and calm and lonely, or go out, have superficially fun times and meet some other superficial people?

Are other people as vacuous as I think they are, or is it just me?